Zombie Research Society
If you’re feeling just a little bit worried about the zombie apocalypse, and you happen to live in Poland, have we got a seminar for you. As you may have guessed, this is a seminar for living humans wanting to learn techniques in preparing to defend themselves from a zombie attack, and not for zombies to learn self defense (although I would pay good money to see that)!
The organizers describe the seminar:
The Zombie Attack Seminar will be held [on August 30th] at the Academy of Physical Education in Warsaw, Poland at the Defense Line Club. The course will be based on Krav Maga and Defendo self defense systems. [These defense systems] will be adapted to fighting and defending against zombies.
Karol Przybyla explains that it would be very difficult and improbable to “kill” a zombie with your bare hands, but you can successfully defend against it. There won’t be any armbars or techniques that cause pain, he says, because zombies would likely not feel pain.
The seminar will consist of:
TACTICS – explaining the tactics of a fight with a zombie – don’t get surrounded by them, try to keep them in a straight line and others
DEFENSE – stopping kicks and powerful punches/pushes – everything that may and will make a zombie lose it’s balance as well as back up – no straight or any other fist punches as seen on TV due to the risk of getting your fist cut on it’s teeth
ESCAPING and defending from a zombie after being knocked to the ground
ATTACK – fighting techniques using everyday objects like crowbars, axes, batons
SUMMARY – the learned techniques will be performed on zombies in a group attack. (The zombies will be the instructor’s assistants with proper safety gear and body part guards).The seminar will be conducted by a Krav Maga black belt and Defendo black belt instructor – Łukasz Osiecki, a member of the Krav Maga Network.
For more information, check out their Facebook Pages:
This is moronic on a level I have not yet seen before. There will likely NEVER be a zombie apocalypse, but even if it does happen, we have no idea how the disease will actually spread or what abilities the zombies may have. Will it be like I am legend zombies? where they can run and leap with deadly accuracy? Or will it be like the lumbering slow walkers of the WALKING dead?
There is no way of knowing, and thus, no way of preparing for such an event.
Not saying everyone couldn’t use some self defense lessons, but as for zombies… its just impossible to predict what they will be like, what they will be able to do, or if we can even be exposed to them at all. ( as in, they might release the virus from spores and it goes airborne in the emediate vicinity. )
There are too many hypothetical scenarios and too many Hollywood movies depicting insane ranges of zombie behavior.
Its like training to give birth… if your a man.
You might believe that, but did you know that the U.S government has a plan in case of a zombie like disease? Also, many researches agree that if a terrorist mixes rabies and the flu, increases time before the patient dies and decreases the incubation time, we may have a fast moving pandemic on our hands that closely resembles a zombie plague. Here’s how it works: Rabies is a disease that damages the brain. It makes the person go insane and highly aggressive. The patient would bite people, and possibly transmit it. The problem with rabies is, the patient dies within a week and is curable. Thats where the flu comes in. The flu is constantly mutating, making it impossible to cure. A rabies/flu combination would be impossible for nature to come up with, but what about a crazy bioterrorist? So, technically a zombie plague IS possible and with biotechnology becoming more and more sophisticated, the zombie threat comes more and more possible. I personally have a shotgun and ammo in my house and a plan to evacuate toward Hawaii if things get ugly. You may call me crazy, but if the day comes, your going to call me smart.
The point I was trying to make is simply that we have no idea what a real zombie outbreak would be like.
Therefore, practicing some zombiefu would likely not do any good.
So what if the U.S government has a plan. That likely wont do any good either. I’m sure even with their “plan” there will be two parts. One, try to combat the virus. Two, If all else fails, nuke the affected area.
I would’t call you crazy. There is always the possibility. I’m just saying that movie zombies and real zombies may be totally different. We have no way of knowing what a combination of rabies and the flu would do. Especially if it constantly mutates.
Also, Hawaii may not be the best idea. Wouldn’t a virus such as this spread faster and mutate more efficiently within a more enclosed populace? You best have 5 boats, a few planes, a helicopter, and a submarine on stand by if your gonna be stuck on an island.
I’m gonna be in Bettles, Alaska where all I gotta worry about is the maybe 15 other people. Hawaii has like 1.3 million people.