Zombie Research Society
In our never-ending quest to provide useful information before, during and after a zombie apocalypse, we have for your consideration, Manhattan dentist Nicholas Toscano, DDS, zombie dentist.
First, let’s set the record straight right now. Dr. Toscano is not a zombie per se, and in fact has never treated a real zombie (that we know of). He is in fact a dentist to the stars, a celebrity dentist if you will. And that very fact by itself might explain his unique knowledge and special interest in zombies, and their teeth. And your teeth for that matter, as it pertains to an apocalypse.
Following one of his dental sessions, Aaron Sagers, TV personality, professional geek and frequent writer for the Huffington Post sat down with Dr. Toscano, to discuss the topic of zombies, teeth, and the apocalypse.
Clearly Dr. Tascano has spent a significant amount of time considering the state of zombie dental health. Or perhaps he really has a few zombies as patients. You decide…
When asked whether or not a zombie’s teeth and jaws could actually inflict the kind of damage we see in the movies and on TV, Tascano answers in the affirmative. He explains that our teeth are harder than bones, and ripping through flesh with them is easy.
If you bit my arm right now, you could probably take a big chunk out of it before I could stop you… You could bite the neck, rip out the artery and it wouldn’t be too difficult.
Tascano goes on to explain the fact that zombies feel no pain would work in their favor when it comes to tooth decay and general poor dental health.
So they can go ahead and bite with an incredible amount of force and pull that flesh off the bone without any sensation of pain [to them]. They actually have a much stronger bite force than what a live human being does.
Tascano feels that zombies would be able to maintain their vicious biting ability without stopping until their teeth literally broke or fell out– about one year or longer he estimates.
And his advise to survivors on maintaining good dental health:
…Raid stores [for] toothpaste, toothbrushes, floss… they have supplies. But if that was not the scenario, some alternatives would be gargling with salt water, trying to kill as much bacteria as possible. Using cotton balls to clean the plaque off your teeth would help. Any type of antiseptic, you could rinse with, like hydrogen peroxide. If they have an abscess, they might have to go the Tom Hanks route from Castaway. He was on an island by himself, didn’t have access to care and was pulling out his own teeth because they were rotting.
Read the entire interview at Huffington Post: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/aaron-sagers/nycs-zombie-dentist-takes_b_4937055.html
The Zombie Research Society has written other articles covering dental hygiene during the apocalypse, as well as a covering a very interesting ‘Zombie Jaw Strength Study.”
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