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7 BADASS ZOMBIE KILLS: SO YOU CAN BE PREPARED!

7 BADASS ZOMBIE KILLS: SO YOU CAN BE PREPARED!

Millions of zombies have been slaughtered in movies, television and literature. But for those of you who study zombies like a PhD, many of these kills can double as both entertainment and resourceful information. So take this advice to heart; and as those zombie novices around you gawk… you’ll be preparing yourself for zombie annihilation!

1. Bazooka Leg

Bazooka Leg
Rose McGowan’s point blank rocket-kick is a joy to watch! Of course, you won’t want to fire from close range and you probably won’t have a bazooka attached to your leg. But the potential to take out hordes of zombies can’t be ignored. In fact, you can actually fire an RPG in Cambodia (on a small military base) or simply purchase your own. Yes, you can buy a bazooka! All you’ll need is an ATF permit and a legitimate online retailer.

2. Forehead Drill

Forehead Drill
This skull puncturing action from the 80’s classic reminds us just how convenient power tools can be. So be sure to fill up your garage with an assortment of drills, saws and crow bars. But don’t forget about a good ladder! It’s best to read up on cordless tools so you’ll be well prepared for both remodeling day and the inevitable zombie apocalypse!

3. Helicopter Massacre

Helicopter Massacre
This decapitation sequence would take the most skilled helicopter pilot. So, why not become one? Helicopter schools are available in 30 different states, including three international schools. Of course flight school might be pricey, but offering private rides could certainly be lucrative. Plus, you can actually finish flight school relatively fast!

4. Always Check Your Mirrors

Always Check Your Mirrors
Don’t take driving lightly as even the slightest mistake on the road could mean your demise when there are hungry zombies around. Make sure that you’re well-rounded with all vehicles: trucks, SUVs, ATVs, motorcycles, etc. Also, remember that zombies can’t swim! So rent a Ski-Doo or boat for practice on the water. If you already own both… good man.

5. Katana Slice

Katana Slice
Danai Gurira can do some major damage to the walking dead with a sword! But for a long time it seemed that these elegant weapons were reserved for LARPing enthusiasts and niche collectors. Of course, Game Of Thrones may quickly bring some new flare to Katana and sword collecting. So you’d better stock up now… and get one for the boat too.

6. The Herd

The Herd

This unsung hero masters zombie crowd control. But a makeshift military won’t always be available, so take note from the Native Americans who often utilized large cliffs by forcing buffalo herds to fall to their death. Zombies will form dense crowds if pushed to a narrow area where they can be led to fire, water, a steep fall, helicopter blades…whatever it takes!

7. Shotgun Headshot

Shotgun Headshot
We all want to deliver accurate headshots like this when the zombie apocalypse comes. But it won’t happen without lots of preparation and fail-proofing. First, you must learn how to handle both pump and lever action firearms. Then head on over to the closest firing range and get some experienced with a number of different weapons and caliber sizes.

Honorable Mention: The best way to take care of zombies.

3 comments

  1. Bazooka? It’s an M203 grenade launcher, or a 37mm flare launcher substitute. Very different beast.

    Probably also worth identifying the movies/TV series featured, for the uninitiated reader.

    • Yeah I have no clue what movie the shotgun headshot is from or the herd is from.

      • I think our contributor thought that guessing the films would be part of the fun.

        But to answer your question: The herd is from “Juan of the Dead” while the shotgun scene is from “Resident Evil: Extinction.”

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