Cracked.com recently posted an entertaining article, 5 Popular Zombie Survival Tactics (That Will Also Get You Killed), that outlines several common mistakes people make when developing their zombie survival plan. Unfortunately, the author only points out doomed strategies, failing to provide any constructive advice.
So here is our commentary on each of the five Cracked points, along with possible solutions to the problems presented:
5) RAID A GUN STORE, AND GET KILLED
The dangers of running to your nearest big box store when the zombies come have been well documented. ZRS Survival Expert, Apocalypse Dan suggest that you not go out at all in the initial days of panic. Stay home and stay safe. Everyone is going to be looking to grab whatever supplies they can, clogging up the streets and parking lots, and killing each other over nothing. The risk of getting shot, infected, followed home, or return to find your house looted or burned down is too great to make the potential benefit worthwhile. Once the initial chaos passes, you can scavenge in relative safety (for Dan’s full article see: Loot Smart, or Loot Dead).
4) GET OUT OF TOWN, AND INTO A TRAFFIC JAM
True, at the first sign of zombies you don’t want to join the millions of other people who are desperately trying to head out-of-town. The roads will be a clogged deathtrap in every direction, but staying put in a populated area is just as deadly in the long term (see: Dont’ Be A People Person). What’s the solution? Borrowing from the previous section, in the initial days of panic, stay home and stay safe. The roads will soon clear up, as travelers either get away from urban areas, or die trying. Your freedom of movement will be greatly increased after the initial wave of hysteria passes.
3) FORTIFY YOUR BASE, AND GET TRAPPED INSIDE
When building a defensive structure the last thing you want to do is accidentally create a tomb (see: Your Zombie Shelter a Death Trap?), but I don’t agree with the suggestion by Cracked that ANY fortified position is doomed to fail. The reality of a dead world is that eventually all pre-collapse food will either be consumed or spoil, making a nomadic, scavenging life impossible. A regular water source, planted crops, and domesticated livestock will become essential, and safe shelter to protect you and your possessions from undead, and living threats is crucial.
2) USE MELEE WEAPONS, AND GET INFECTED
The problem of deadly zombie blood spatter when using melee weapons is very real, but not something that can’t be addressed by wearing protective gear (see: More Dumb Zombie Survivalists). Additionally, there are a wide range of weapons to consider, each with different advantages and disadvantages. The fact is that less than 15% of the US population owns firearms, and the percentage is much lower in most other countries. When the dead rise, most people will need to use some sort of edged or blunt object to defend themselves (for more see: Best Zombie Defense Weapon).
1) ALWAYS AIM FOR THE HEAD, AND DIE TRYING
Though it’s widely accepted that zombies are killed by destroying the brain, that doesn’t mean that they can’t suffer substantial damage from wounds suffered in other parts of the body. This point is well made in the Crackled post. A zombie with its kneecaps shattered may still want to eat you, but it’s probably not going to represent a credible threat dragging itself across the ground. Research also suggests that aiming for a zombies chest, back and neck could prove as effective as a head shot (see: The Theory of Zombie Paralysis).
What do you think? Comments, thoughts, good advice?